Thursday, May 27, 2010

Good Grief

After 25 years of research (my life), I've come to the conclusion that each of us is in a different stage of the grieving process at any given time.

These steps are defined on as follows:

Five Stages Of Grief

  1. Denial and Isolation.
    At first, we tend to deny the loss has taken place, and may withdraw from our usual social contacts. This stage may last a few moments, or longer.

  2. Anger.
    The grieving person may then be furious at the person who inflicted the hurt [even God - italics are mine], or at the world, for letting it happen. He may be angry with himself for letting the event take place, even if, realistically, nothing could have stopped it.

  3. Bargaining.
    Now the grieving person may make bargains with God, asking, "If I do this, will you take away the loss?"

  4. Depression.
    The person feels numb, although anger and sadness may remain underneath.

  5. Acceptance.
    This is when the anger, sadness and mourning have tapered off. The person simply accepts the reality of the loss.
Grief can happen for many reasons, not just the death of a loved one, people or pets. It can occur after moving away from a familiar place or a close group of friends, when a relationship fails, after losing or changing a job or career, or even when your favorite coffee shop closes... It can occur at any stage of life: childhood, college years, career age, middle age, empty nest age, and especially in the senior years. Grief is something we all have in common, and no one is exempt from. This scripture is of special comfort to me in times of grief.

Lamentations 3:22-26

22 Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

24 I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."

25 The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;

26 it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.

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